For my 1990 babies, we’ve either arrived at 25 already or we’re approaching it soon, real soon. 25 is a monumental age and it comes with a lot of expectations. It’s kind of the end of an era in life: the post high-school, early twenties, “We could still fuck around” era. The window of flexibility is closing, but we’re still very much developing and finding ourselves, at least I’am. If you asked me where I’d be at 25, when I was 17, it wouldn’t necessarily be where I’m at. However, back then I wasn’t exactly a realist, I still had the luxury of time and dreamt more than I really planned for the future. I did achieve my bachelors degree this past year and I’ve had a couple of minor accomplishments along the way, but my more fulfilling victories are still in the making. There are still a couple of pivatol aspects of life to figure out but if life is just a manifestation of where your mind is, things are looking promising.
Though I’m not in the space I’d like to be, career-wise or financially, I still find myself happy as a young man. I’m happy because I can truly say that I have a firm grip on who I’am as a person, I’m comfortable in my flaws and confident in my muscle. One of the biggest strength’s is knowing your weakness. Toxic relationships, non-fulfilling jobs, the college life, and a lot of the love around me, have all brought me closer to myself & has had a heavy hand in building my character. Whether it was depression bouts, insecurity or surrounding myself with bad energy, I’ve gained a true understanding and appreciation for the struggles of my late-teens and early twenties, because I’m starting to see how it’s all contributing to this slightly dark but beautiful piece of art that I call my life. It’s either your demise or it builds you back, stronger, and I took the latter. I’ve gained faith thanks to the turbulence, which is something I always had a tough time coming to terms with. Having faith in the fact that the challenges I face are nothing more than minor-setbacks and character builders, has led to more patience & understanding, and less unnecessary weight & stress.
I see the progression of some of the people around me, or those from my past, and it gives me a sense of motivation. Which represents growth for me and a 180 degree turn from the days when someone, my age, doing it bigger than me used to make me feel like lesser of a man. Instead of seeing it as “why isn’t that me”, it’s more of a salute and “see when I get there” mentality that I’ve grown into. It took some time for me to realize that nothing will set you back like constantly comparing yourself to the next man/woman, and thinking of “where you should’ve been in life by this point”. With a lighter head and less traffic in my mind, I’m able to really process jewels from my successful piers and old heads who’ve seen their share of ups and downs.
I still have my darker days, of course, a better perspective can’t prevent that but it can help deal with the once-in-a-blue blues, more productively. In my 24th year, my responsibilities and sudden inconveniences caused money struggles, I’ve lost a couple people, I’ve had my resume denied by some great jobs, but contrary to my past ways, I keep on, keepin’ on because there’s really nothing else you can do. Check-to-check jobs and not attaining my dream opportunity (yet) have made me hungrier and gave me an admiration of life beyond money and status. But in my 25th year, it’s time for me to get this money and put the finishing touches on my vision, letting my potential come to fruition…To my fellow beloved born in the same year Bel Biv Devoe released “Poison”, keep a clear head and find your spot in this big-ass world…
Sidebar: August 15th is my 25th